Toxic positivity

There’s a phenomenon in spirituality circles where negativity is strongly discouraged by practitioners. I believe it is known as toxic positivity.

Speaking about negative things or criticising yourself and others was frowned upon. “It was a good-vibes-only kind of mentality,” Miranda explains. “Some of that comes from yogic philosophy, but it’s been exaggerated. You see it everywhere on social media – reels, memes and soundbites about positivity bordering on toxic. Tara Yoga took it to the extreme.” In hindsight, she says, “These thought patterns cause you to overlook your own boundaries, especially when it comes to trusting ourselves.” Yet the idea of letting go of your existing beliefs to become happier and more enlightened was appealing: the idea that you can manifest your way to a better life.

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Be like Cathy

When I was 14 or 15 years old and still a Christian, a boy who was older than me (17, I think) told me that God wanted me to be his girlfriend. I didn’t reciprocate but I was worried enough about it that I asked an older female friend, Cathy, what she thought. Luckily for me, she said that if God wanted me to be in a relationship with him, I would feel the same way about it. Thank you, Cathy. 

And thankfully the boy accepted that the answer was no.

The girl in this story (Sarah Carr) didn’t have a Cathy. She finally got justice after nearly 25 years.

The pastor who was betrothed to a child — Friendly Atheist

She has also started a group to help people in the same situation:

the Reclamation Collective, a non-profit group that creates space for those “harmed within religious and spiritual spaces.”

Sarah Carr