Great post about DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender), a tactic frequently used in high control religions to prevent their adherents from leaving.
high-control religions
Red flags
The best dating site, in my opinion, is OKCupid, because you can ask and answer questions about your dealbreaker issues. Then you don’t need to go on a date with some idiot who believes stuff like “women should submit to their husbands” or “pregnant rape victims should carry the foetus to term”.
Continue readingRapping about the rapture
I’m thankful that I was not brought up with the nonsense about the rapture (which is weird because I grew up in the Exclusive Plymouth Brethren until the age of 9, and it was apparently the founder of the Plymouth Brethren, JN Darby, who popularized the concept of the rapture, along with dispensationalist theology). But I recognize that it is still traumatic to think about for a lot of people.
Continue readingDeprogramming with Gillian Jenkinson
Just got an update from Gillian Jenkinson:
Inside the Cult of the Jesus Army BBC2 27 July and 3 August 9pm
I had the privilege of being filmed delivering Post-Cult Counselling in a Recovery Workshop for a documentary “Inside the Cult of the Jesus Army” with four amazing survivors. This was filmed at my house in the Hope Valley by a wonderful team who have been very professional and supportive in every way throughout this process.
The two-part documentary includes a history of JA and archive material, interviews and the Recovery Workshop and is being screened on Sunday 27th July and 3rd August at 9pm on BBC 2. It will be on BBC iPlayer from 27th July.
There will also be a podcast (which I am not involved with) which will be very interesting as it will address legal issues around cults/coercive control amongst many other things.
High control covens
There’s a new article from Storm Faerywolf on The Wild Hunt today talking about the warning signs of high control groups and covens.
Members of these damaged covens are often instructed not to socialize with others outside the group, or lineage, or are otherwise told certain individuals to avoid. Information is often restricted; leadership oftentimes telling congregants that certain books or materials are forbidden, especially those that challenge the teachings or politics of group leadership.
I’ve written similar articles and lists before too.
And my book Changing Paths is about how to extricate yourself from high control groups and find a healthy group or tradition.
Be like Cathy
When I was 14 or 15 years old and still a Christian, a boy who was older than me (17, I think) told me that God wanted me to be his girlfriend. I didn’t reciprocate but I was worried enough about it that I asked an older female friend, Cathy, what she thought. Luckily for me, she said that if God wanted me to be in a relationship with him, I would feel the same way about it. Thank you, Cathy.
And thankfully the boy accepted that the answer was no.
The girl in this story (Sarah Carr) didn’t have a Cathy. She finally got justice after nearly 25 years.
The pastor who was betrothed to a child — Friendly Atheist
She has also started a group to help people in the same situation:
the Reclamation Collective, a non-profit group that creates space for those “harmed within religious and spiritual spaces.”
Review: An Apostate’s Guide to Witchcraft
Once upon a time, Christendom labelled the Emperor Julian “the Apostate” because he reverted to Paganism. Nowadays, the title is applied to people who leave the Jehovah’s Witnesses.
Moss Matthey left the JWs in order to live his truth as a gay man—as many others have left high control religious groups for the same reason.
Not long after he left, he discovered witchcraft, as well as a loving relationship and a community of Pagans and witches and occultists.
This joyous and life-affirming book is the account of his journey from fear and despair to the joy of living as his authentic self, as a gay man and as a witch.
Continue readingDeconstruction story: Richard Swan
A friend shared a Facebook post by Richard Swan (in the fun group Dull Men’s Club) today, talking about how vanishingly few people are tone deaf, and most people can sing.
I take the view that singing is an outpouring of the soul and one of the cruellest things a person can do is to tell someone else that they can’t sing, so this is a topic that is very close to my heart.
My interest was piqued so I went searching to find out more about Richard Swan. He’s also written a book for people who think they can’t sing, which looks very worthwhile. And in my travels I found this podcast about his deconstruction journey and wanted to share it.
Continue readingA healing journey
A new book from Moss Matthey, An apostate’s guide to witchcraft: finding freedom through magic, explores his personal journey from fundamentalist Christianity to witchcraft.
Moss writes:
Continue readingThis book is about my journey from a fundamentalist Christian cult to the joyous and freeing world of Witchcraft. Blending my personal experience with gentle exercises, this book is for anyone who is curious about witchcraft and alternative spirituality. It is also great for those seeking a way in to witchcraft, especially so if they are coming to this path from another faith. It focuses on joy, enchantment and freedom, to leave any reader feeling uplifted and inspired.
State funding removed from Norwegian JWs
In Norway, subject to rules about not being coercive or oppressive, all religious groups can apply for state funding.
Due to the JWs’ practice of disfellowshipping and shunning people who leave, including children, the Norwegian government has removed their funding.
Friendly Atheist: Norwegian court upholds ban on state funding of Jehovah’s Witnesses
Changing Paths 