Great post about DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender), a tactic frequently used in high control religions to prevent their adherents from leaving.
escaping fundamentalism
Do you fear death?
Another excellent piece from John Beckett on how Pagans think about death.
Do you fear death?
I don’t fear death because I don’t believe in heaven or hell, which is a pernicious doctrine designed to cause fear. I believe in the Summerlands, which is a completely different place.
I also have reasonable belief in the continuation of consciousness after death. And if that doesn’t happen, I am at peace with that.
Discerning good theology
It may seem that there’s no point criticizing other people’s theological beliefs because from the standpoint of atheists, all religious beliefs are equally unreasonable, but different theological beliefs are not equal, and they lead to different outcomes.
I define theology as beliefs about gods, spirits, and ethics: how we show up in the world as humans.
Continue readingRed flags
The best dating site, in my opinion, is OKCupid, because you can ask and answer questions about your dealbreaker issues. Then you don’t need to go on a date with some idiot who believes stuff like “women should submit to their husbands” or “pregnant rape victims should carry the foetus to term”.
Continue readingRapping about the rapture
I’m thankful that I was not brought up with the nonsense about the rapture (which is weird because I grew up in the Exclusive Plymouth Brethren until the age of 9, and it was apparently the founder of the Plymouth Brethren, JN Darby, who popularized the concept of the rapture, along with dispensationalist theology). But I recognize that it is still traumatic to think about for a lot of people.
Continue readingUnpacking religious baggage
John Beckett is offering an online course, Unpacking Your Religious Baggage So You Can Live a Magical Life.
Continue readingDeprogramming with Gillian Jenkinson
Just got an update from Gillian Jenkinson:
Inside the Cult of the Jesus Army BBC2 27 July and 3 August 9pm
I had the privilege of being filmed delivering Post-Cult Counselling in a Recovery Workshop for a documentary “Inside the Cult of the Jesus Army” with four amazing survivors. This was filmed at my house in the Hope Valley by a wonderful team who have been very professional and supportive in every way throughout this process.
The two-part documentary includes a history of JA and archive material, interviews and the Recovery Workshop and is being screened on Sunday 27th July and 3rd August at 9pm on BBC 2. It will be on BBC iPlayer from 27th July.
There will also be a podcast (which I am not involved with) which will be very interesting as it will address legal issues around cults/coercive control amongst many other things.
Debunking clobber verses
Websites that unpack and de-fang religious beliefs about same-sex love and gender nonconformity come and go. I occasionally still meet people who think that all churches are homophobic, or that Christianity and homosexuality just aren’t compatible. And there are always new exvangelicals emerging blinking into the light of day and deconstructing the toxic beliefs that were foisted upon them.
So it is great to see a new series of essays from Father Nathan Monk on Facebook:
Continue readingBe like Cathy
When I was 14 or 15 years old and still a Christian, a boy who was older than me (17, I think) told me that God wanted me to be his girlfriend. I didn’t reciprocate but I was worried enough about it that I asked an older female friend, Cathy, what she thought. Luckily for me, she said that if God wanted me to be in a relationship with him, I would feel the same way about it. Thank you, Cathy.
And thankfully the boy accepted that the answer was no.
The girl in this story (Sarah Carr) didn’t have a Cathy. She finally got justice after nearly 25 years.
The pastor who was betrothed to a child — Friendly Atheist
She has also started a group to help people in the same situation:
the Reclamation Collective, a non-profit group that creates space for those “harmed within religious and spiritual spaces.”
Afterlife jokes
When I was a kid, there was this joke.
A man goes to heaven. As he’s walking along the entrance hall with St Peter, he sees a closed door. He asks who’s in there. St Peter says, “Sssshhh, that’s the Plymouth Brethren* in there — they think they’re the only ones here.”
(* Insert obnoxious denomination of your choice)
Continue reading
Changing Paths 